Saudara Durian

Musim buah-buahan muncul kembali! Itu bagi orang yang ada dusun la. Yang takde dusun cuba bukak balik diari lama atau senarai nama kenalan atau sedara mara. Ipar duai pun check jugak. Biras pun kira sedara. Bukan apa, sekaranglah waktu kita nak merapatkan tali silaturrahim yang renggang atau yang dah terputus langsung. Anda yang membaca posting ni jangan berasa tersindir pulak. Sebenarnya saya baru balik kampung minggu lepas. Tak sangka pulak musim buah-buahan sekarang. Jom kita cuci mata... Macam-macam ada :)

Dua longgok buah durian menanti setia 'saudara durian' datang menjamah.

Rambutan pun sedang masak ranum, yang merah ada, yang kuning pun ada.

Lepas makan durian, makan manggis pulak untuk sejukkan badan sikit.

Pisang pun tumpang sekaki, kena sindrom musim buah.

Ciku dan jambu yang jeles tengok geng lain berbuah berpakat ikut mengeluarkan buah!

Elikopter yang bakal digunakan untuk memunggah semua hasil dusun.

Pemeriksaan imigresen yang ketat bagi memastikan hasil dusun tidak dirampok pihak luar yang menyamar sebagai 'saudara durian'.

Dua pendatang asing yang berjaya melepasi imigresen untuk membantu di reban akibat sindrom kekurangan pekerja tempatan.

Dua sedara durian bersiap membawa hasil dusun pulang ke kota dengan kenderaaan mini pelbagai guna (elikopter dah rosak).

Anda semua jangan salah anggap pulak. Saya ni bukan jenis 'saudara durian' yang balik waktu musim buah-buahan aja. Saya pulang atas urusan kenduri arwah. Maklumlah, tak lama lagi nak puasa.

Lagi Testimoni pemilik "Mentor Jutawan"

Testimoni 1:

Mentor Jutawan sememangnya harus dimiliki dan dibaca oleh sesiapa sahaja yang mempunyai hasrat untuk menjadi jutawan pada suatu hari nanti ataupun sekurang-kurangnya untuk berada di tahap bebas kewangan.

Pengalaman 8 jutawan yang terpaksa melalui pelbagai kesusahan dan kegagalan yang berbeza sebelum berjaya dan bergelar jutawan harus dijadikan panduan supaya kita tidak mengulangi kesilapan mereka. Pelbagai tips, rahsia, pengalaman, panduan dan ilmu yang dicurahkan oleh 8 jutawan adalah tidak ternilai harganya dan saya pasti harga ebook ini tidak sepatutnya dijual dengan harga RM40.00.

Tanamkan tekad dan kuatkan semangat, Insyallah kita juga boleh mencapai cita-cita untuk berjaya seperti mereka suatu hari nanti.

Azmi
www.wavecommunications.com.my

Testimoni 2:

Tak sampai 5 minit membaca laman web mengenai Mentor Jutawan, saya terus buat pesanan tanpa ragu-ragu.

Kenapa?
Saya tahu betapa besarnya ilmu yang bakal diperolehi daripada ikon-ikon jutawan Malaysia yang semestinya juga menjadi mentor kepada saya secara senyap-senyap. Bukannya senang untuk mendapatkan ilmu pengetahuan yang berdasarkan pengalaman dan pengorbanan seseorang jutawan. Lagipun, bukan setakat seorang, malah 8 orang jutawan mendedahkan rahsia, tips dan strategi kejayaan mereka.

Pastinya saya tak mahu ketinggalan mempelajari sebanyak mana yang mungkin. Di dalam setiap bicarawara yang diberikan, ada sahaja perkara baru yang saya pelajari - ada sahaja yang akan menjadi titik tolak kepada usaha saya untuk terus berjaya.

Terima kasih kepada semua mentor jutawan -Dato’ Dr Fadzilah Kamsah, Azizi Ali, Chef Li, Dato’ Dr Azman Ching, Billi Lim, Datuk Hussamuddin Yaacob, Abang Abu dan Irfan Khairi. Setinggi tahniah diucapkan kepada Irfan Khairi kerana mencipta sebuah ebook yang padat berisi dan semestinya ada ummph!

Kata orang putih “Success Leave Clues” (Kejayaan Ada Petunjuknya)… ebook Mentor Jutawan ini adalah petunjuknya. Oleh itu, jadikan ebook Mentor Jutawan sebagai panduan dan inspirasi anda untuk maju ke hadapan.

Jika anda belum mendapatkan ebook ini lagi, pastikan anda buat pesanan pada hari ini juga.

Zamri Nanyan
Usahawan Internet dan Penulis bersama buku
“Rahsia Bisnes MLM Di Internet”
www.BisnesDigital.com

Testimoni pemilik "Mentor Jutawan"

Testimoni 1:

Membaca eBook Mentor Jutawan seolah-olah anda sendiri bertemu bual secara dekat dengan kelapan-lapan Mentor Jutawan berkenaan.

Satu-satunya ebook yang memuatkan dan menghimpunkan pengalaman dan dorongan daripada mereka yang bergelar JUTAWAN!

Apa sahaja yang kita lakukan, didorong oleh inspirasi, eBook ini mendorong kita untuk menuju ke arah menjadi JUTAWAN! eBook yang harus dimiliki oleh semua yang ingin bergelar JUTAWAN!

Salam kekayaan,
THINKERICH
www.pemikirkaya.com

Testimoni 2:

Saya baru sahaja selesai membaca buku ini. Apa yang hendak saya katakan bahawa buku ini bernilai. Pada mulanya saya sangkakan hanya sedikit input sahaja dikongsi kerana ianya berbentuk temuramah berbanding cara kebiasaan sesebuah buku ditulis.

Tetapi jangkaan saya meleset. Memang banyak input dikongsi. Jika anda membeli buku ini, pastikan sebuah nota ringkas bersama anda. Saya jamin, sekurang-kurangnya anda akan menjumpai satu idea yang bernilai daripada setiap personaliti untuk diimplementasikan.

www.drinspirasi.com

Testimoni 3:

Wau! Tidak pernah terfikir kita akan jadi jutawan dengan menjual pau atau kacang goreng.
Saya teruja pada formula “banyak baca buku, kita akan bertambah kaya” dan tip “doktor dalam perang”.

Syabas kepada yang membeli ebook ini! Yang pastinya, Mentor Jutawan akan melahirkan lebih ramai jutawan dalam masa 7-10 tahun dari sekarang.

Selamat berusaha dan semoga kita sama-sama berjaya.

Rohaizan Khamis
http://gempurhpa.blogspot.com

The 'First Lady-in-waiting'

The daily 'Today' wrote an article last month about Rosmah Mansor, which they called the 'First Lady-in-waiting'.
Excerpt from one of their interviews:
"They say Ms Rosmah is not as humble as the present First Lady and the former ones" Kuala Lumpur resident A L Tan.

Airport Klate

Bahasa Jiwa Bangsa, dengan semangat itulah papan tanda di lapangan terbang di Kelantan dinaik taraf untuk lebih 'mesra Klate' :)

Bangang

Bagaimana mahu mengenali mereka - mereka yang bangang ?

Well, wonder no more. Ini jawapannya :

Apa Itu Zulu Principle?

Pernah dengar terma ini : Zulu Principle?

Sebenarnya ia adalah sebuah buku yang ditulis oleh Jim Slater berkenaan dengan pelaburan.
Di dalam buku The Zulu Principle ada mengatakan jika kita baca sebuah buku berkenaan dengan industri yang kita ceburi, maka kita akan jadi pakar di kalangan kawan-kawan kita. Jika kita baca 5 buah buku, kita pakar di kalangan jiran-jiran kita. Seterusnya baca 20-50 buah buku, kita pakar dalam kawasan taman perumahan kita. Dan begitulah seterusnya.

Berikut sebahagian dari sinopsis buku tersebut yang dipetik dari laman "www.travismorien.com/FAQ/shares/jszulu.htm" :

"Slater realised that the more you focus your attention on an area, in particular an area neglected by the wider community, the easier it would be to become an eminent expert in that subject. Slater's books are all about investing in small growth companies that are ignored by the institutions. He suggests a form of specialisation that will enable you to outperform the markets by gaining a massive competitive edge in areas neglected by most investors.

Slater says that small investors have a big edge over large ones. These are the advantages the little guy has:

• Less money to invest, which means they can invest with more effect in smaller companies.
• Their first ten selections are usually sufficient to constitute their entire portfolio, whereas institutions are handicapped by having to invest in hundreds of shares. As a result, the institutions are able to pay less attention to their individual holdings.
• Their circle of competence can be more meaningfully applied to a small portfolio."

Begitulah prinsip yang diamalkan jutawan muda Irfan Khairi dalam menjalankan perniagaan internetnya. Dapatkan ebook "Mentor Jutawan" kalau nak mendalami rahsia, tip dan pengalaman 8 orang usahawan Malaysia yang telah pun bergelar jutawan.

Siapa tahu, dengan hanya mengamalkan satu tip mereka sahaja pun , mungkin anda dapat perbaiki tahap kewangan anda.

Selamat mencuba!

Peluang Jana Pendapatan Menerusi "Mentor Jutawan"

Kepada yang berminat nak join program affiliate tapi masih ragu-ragu, masanya sudah tiba.

Kini telah muncul program affiliate dipelopori oleh anak Malaysia bernama Irfan Khairi. Program ini dikenali sebagai "Mentor Jutawan" yang membayar komisyen RM10 bagi setiap belian.

Jangan berlengah lagi!
Mari kita jana pendapatan melalui program affiliate anak tempatan.

Kesan Kenaikan Harga Minyak Kepada TUDM

Anekdot MV Agusta

"Pada tahun 2005, dengan persetujuan Abdullah Ahmad Badawi, Proton dipaksa menjual MV Agusta dengan harga satu Euro dan menderita kerugian RM500 juta. Pada 12 Julai lalu, BMW menjual MV Agusta kepada Harley-Davidson dengan harga US$109 juta (RM359.7 juta). Tidakkah Badan Pencegah Rasuah atau sebuah suruhanjaya bebas berminat menyiasat kejadian ini?"

Dipetik dari : kadirjasin.blogspot.com

maznah

Bagi anda yang mengikuti kisah pembunuhan Altantuya Sharibuu, mungkin ada yang terlupa sebelum ini pun ada pelbagai kes pembunuhan kejam yang menunjukkan rakyat Malaysia juga punya 'skill' atau imaginasi yang tak kurang 'hebatnya'.

Pada tahun 1993, Ahli Dewan Undangan Negeri Batu Talam, Datuk Mazlan Idris telah dibunuh dengan kejam. Watak-watak yang terlibat: Mohd Affandi Abdul Rahman dan isterinya, Maznah Ismail atau lebih dikenali sebagai Mona Fandey serta pembantu mereka, Juraimi Husin.

Dalam puisi "maznah" tulisan T. Alias Taib pada tahun 2001, beliau menggambarkan pembunuhan itu begini :

maznah bomoh dari kuala perlis
berenang tenang di sungai manusia
pandai senyum dan berjenaka

kira-kira lapan tahun lalu
dibentangkannya peta pembunuhan
kepada affandi dan juraimi

peta itu peta strategi yang rapi
mazlan si adun batu talam
akan dipotong 18 bahagian

10 Cool Ways To Attract People To Your Web Site

1. Give people a free subscription to your e-zine. Almost everyone is publishing a e-zine nowadays so it's important to give something extra with the free subscription. You could offer a free gift or advertising when people subscribe.

2. Provide your visitors with free content. Your content will be more attractive to your visitors if it's up-to-date or original. You could also offer people the option to reprint the content in their e-zine or web site.

3. Offer a free online directory. The directory could be full of interesting ebooks, e-zines, web sites etc. If people find your directory to be a valuable resource they will visit it over and over.

4. Give your visitors a free ebook. You could also include your own ad in the ebook and allow other people to give it away. If you don't want to take the time to write one, you could ask other writers permission to use their articles.

5. Hold free online classes or seminars. They could be held in your web site's chat room. The idea of "live" information will definitely entice people to visit your web site. You will become known as an expert on the topic.

6. Give visitors a free entry into your contest or sweepstakes. The prizes should be something of interest or value to your visitors. Most people who enter will continually revisit your web site to get the results.

7. Let visitors download free software. It could be freeware, shareware, demos etc. You could even turn part of your site into a free software directory. If you created the software, include your ad inside and let other people give it away.

8. Offer free online services or utilities from your web site. They could be search engine submitting, copy writing proofreading etc. The service or utility should be helpful to your target audience.

9. Give free consulting to people who visit your web site. You could offer your knowledge via e-mail or by telephone. People will consider this a huge value because consulting fees can be very expensive.

10. Give your visitors a free membership to your online club. People want to belong to something, why not your online club. You could also give away a free e-zine for club members only.

Jubli Perak Sekolah Menengah Sains Muar

Tanggal 26 jun 2008 telah diadakan majlis sambutan Jubli Perak bersempena 25 tahun Sekolah Menengah Sains Muar. Majalah rasmi sekolah pada tahun awal penubuhannya mengguna pakai nama Tanjung, merujuk pada Sekolah Menengah Sains Muar yang bermukim di Tanjung Agas, Muar, Johor.

Lebih dua puluh tahun yang lalu, saya juga pernah memukimi bumi Tanjung. Terletak berhampiran muara sungai yang membentang ke Selat Melaka, hidup saya dan rakan-rakan sering diramahi hembusan bayu. Tanjung bukanlah satu mukabumi yang dipenuhi panorama keindahan, tapi kami tetap ceria dan bahagia memukimi buminya.

Sebahagian dari kami menetap di Tanjung selama lima tahun, manakala sebahagian yang lain pula hanya untuk tempoh dua tahun. Walau berapa lama atau singkat pun jarak masa kami bertapak di bumi Tanjung, nama Tanjung akan tetap mekar di sanubari. Tanjung adalah sebahagian dari sejarah usia kehidupan kami. Bagaimana mungkin kami akan melupakannya?

Banyak juga kenakalan kami sewaktu memesrai tanah bertuah Tanjung. Ponteng kelas persediaan, menceroboh masuk asrama puteri, keluar asrama waktu malam (tak pasti kenapa aktiviti ni lebih dikenali sebagai 'fly' - tak terbang pun, menyusup keluar pagar je, tapi memang 'thrill' - mungkin sebab tu namanya 'fly'), hisap rokok (yang ini dipanggil 'song')....

Dan pastinya kami tidak akan terlepas dari hukuman. Tapi kenakalan - kenakalan itu tidaklah sampai memesongkan halatuju hidup kami. Malah kami berterima kasih pada semua warga Tanjung, para guru khasnya yang berjaya membentuk kami menjadi insan sewajarnya.

Sebahagian dari kami mungkin berjaya dalam kehidupan masing-masing dan memiliki kerjaya setaraf golongan pertengahan ('middle class'). Sebahagian yang lain pula telah mengukir kejayaan yang lebih menjulang dan membanggakan.

Semuanya bertitik tolak dari bumi Tanjung.


Walau sejauh mana sekalipun jarak masa meninggalkan era kehidupan kami di bumi Tanjung, percikan kenangannya yang berwarna warni akan kekal tersimpan utuh di sudut ingatan. Hati kami akan kerap mengenang Tanjung, lebih-lebih pada waktu usia Sekolah Menengah Sains Muar mencecah dua puluh lima tahun.

Kepada para guru yang menjadi idola kami, terima kasih pada curahan jasa dan bakti juga pengorbanan tanpa batas yang tak mungkin terbalas sepanjang hayat kami. Cikgu semua adalah keluarga kedua kami kerana cikgu pengganti kedua ibu bapa kami (saya agak beremosi menulis coretan ini kerana saya baru sahaja kehilangan ibu tersayang 12 Rabiul awal yang lalu).

Khas untuk cikgu 'favorite' saya Cikgu Ramli Aziz dan Cikgu Suradi Sarikon : salam rindu dan sayang dari anakanda :)

Untuk adik-adik yang masih meramahi bumi Tanjung : nikmati setiap saat kehidupan di situ. Suatu hari nanti tika kamu tidak dapat mengundur masa, kamu akan merindui saat-saat mesra dan gulana semasa remaja di situ. Percayalah!

Untuk rakan-rakan yang telah meninggalkan kemanisan atau kepahitan hidup di Tanjung : walau apa pun yang diperkatakan, kita tetap warga Tanjung dulu, kini dan dot dot dot ...

Selamat Menyambut JUBLI PERAK buat warga Tanjung!

V For Vendetta

This is the movie that I'm not tired of watching.
Especially in the moment of political crisis Malaysia is facing right now.

V is an idea, a symbol, a metaphor that cannot be destroyed. A man can be obliterated but as an idea, an icon he is indestructible and his message becomes more powerful to convey as people look upon this figure, but not the man beneath it. One man can make a huge difference but united men and women can change something.

"V For Vendetta" reminds us that "People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people."


V for Vendetta Televised Speech :

"Good evening, London. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine- the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke.

But in the spirit of commemoration, thereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone's death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, a celebration of a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this November the 5th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat.

There are of course those who do not want us to speak. I suspect even now, orders are being shouted into telephones, and men with guns will soon be on their way. Why? Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power.

Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something terribly wrong with this country, isn't there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission.

How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease.

There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the now high chancellor, Adam Sutler. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent.

Last night I sought to end that silence. Last night I destroyed the Old Bailey, to remind this country of what it has forgotten. More than four hundred years ago a great citizen wished to embed the fifth of November forever in our memory. His hope was to remind the world that fairness, justice, and freedom are more than words, they are perspectives.

So if you've seen nothing, if the crimes of this government remain unknown to you then I would suggest you allow the fifth of November to pass unmarked. But if you see what I see, if you feel as I feel, and if you would seek as I seek, then I ask you to stand beside me one year from tonight, outside the gates of Parliament, and together we shall give them a fifth of November that shall never, ever be forgot."

"Remember, remember the 5th of November, the gun powder treason and plot. I know of no reason why the gun powder treason should ever be forgot."

Learn French With Van Damme "Aware"

A lesson of philosophy for advanced students... in good French :

“Tu regardes à l’intérieur de toi et tu deviens aware of your own body !”

“Les plantes par exemple, qui n’ont pas de mains, et pas d’oreilles, elles sentent les choses, les vibrations, elles sont plus aware que les autres species.”

“Une femme qui est enceinte, par exemple, elle est aware dès qu’elle attend un enfant…”

“Quand je vois un enfant qui est moitié Belge, moitié Viêt-Cong, et qui est mon enfant, tu vois…, c’est…, c’est…, c’est, mon Dieu, c’est quoi ?”

Je vous présente le monsieur Van Damme soi-même dans le video :

Remembering Dato' Mokhtar Dahari (13 November 1953 - 11 July 1991)

Tomorrow (11 July 1991) will be 17 years Malaysian football without its icon : Mokhtar Dahari. He left us 17 years ago without a warning.

When his career hit its peak, Mokhtar Dahari was nicknamed "SuperMokh" and World Star Soccer magazine ranked him among the best player in Asia. Mokhtar played for Malaysia from 1972 till 1985.

And what happened to our Malaysian football after he left? Going downward. Today our national team is still struggling to beat teams like Cambodia and Laos.

No wonder we still miss him after so many years.
Al Fatihah.

BONAMA

Jawatan Kuasa Kabinet mengenai Istiadat telah mengeluarkan Surat Pekeliling mengenai adab dan cara bersalam yang betul mengikut norma Malaysia.

Sila fahami .....


Cara bersalam yang betul

1. Badan perlu dibengkokkan 90 darjah.
2. Yang menyalam perlu memegang kedua belah tangan orang yang disalam.
3. Sengetkan kepala ke kanan sedikit untuk mendapat 'feel' yang lebih.

4. Mulut yang mencium tangan perlu dimuncung lebih kurang 1 inci.

Contoh dibawah:


Kadangkala cara ini juga dinamakan 'BONAMA' iaitu .. BODEK NAK MAMPUS !!!
Di zaman Greek tua dulu, 'bonama' ialah sejenis penyakit sawan akut yang amat ditakuti semua yang disebabkan oleh virus jahat bernama 'bodekus'.

Every Breath You Take

Every Breath You Take
(edited by Penganggurpaksa.blogspot.com)

Every breath you take
Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every step you take
We’ll be watching you

Every single day
Every word you say
Every game you play
Every night you stay
We’ll be watching you

Oh, can’t you see
None belongs to ye!
How our poor heart aches
With every step you take

Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
We’ll be watching you

Since you’re on top we been lost without a grace
We dream at night how our life to face
We look around but it’s you we need to replace
We feel so cold as you shouldn’t be in that place
We keep crying Dollah, Dollah, please...

Oh, cant you see
None belongs to ye!
How our poor heart aches
With every breath you take

Every move you make
Every vow you break
Every smile you fake
Every claim you stake
Well be watching you

Every move you make
Every step you take
We’ll be watching you

We’ll be watching you
We’ll be watching you
We’ll be watching you
We’ll be watching you...


The real Police song :

Protest in Kelana Jaya

Protest in Kelana Jaya on the increase of oil price (Sunday 6th July). Picture taken from TV Smith.

Sheetrock shit

Currently I'm doing a translation for an agency in Bangkok, Thailand.
There is one word I'm not able to translate from English to Malay.
Sheetrock.
Anyone knows what exactly the word means (preferably in Malay)?
Otherwise I'll have to guess the equivalent term in Malay.
From Google, it is a similar term for plasterboard or dry wall.

Goodbye Shell!

Starting from July 1st, I'll become employee of AT&T Inc.
Previously I worked for Shell IT International (SITI) for two years.
I like working for Shell and really enjoyed the working environment in Shell. A lot of good memories. And good learning experience too.

But Shell top management have other things in their mind.
So they outsourced their IT employees worldwide: in Malaysia, Netherlands, UK, US and everywhere. AT&T won the $1.6 billion contract to provide advanced telecommunications services to Shell .

I'm part of that outsourcing thing, and I'm outsourced to AT&T.
For those you guys out there who are in the similar situation... Welcome to AT&T.



To Shell, good bye and good luck!





"Some memories are best forgotten.
Memory can change the shape of a room; it can change the color of a car. And memories can be distorted. They're just an interpretation, they're not a record, and they're irrelevant if you have the facts."
(Leonard Shelby, "Memento", 2001)

How Much is A Tin Of Glucolin?

About a couple of months back, it was about RM8++.

Now, it cost me RM10.90 (at Giant).

What is happening to our beloved country?

No wonder so many people leaving for a better opportunity elsewhere.


Related comments taken from CheDet.com :

"But the Government is still talking about 5%-7% inflation. This is quite meaningless to lower and middle-income people who must pay 40% more for petrol and 100% more for rice. Other necessities too have increased in price by well over 5%-7%. Stopping price control in the belief that the market will determine prices is imprudent."

"One of the reasons why Malaysia's inflation rates had remained low compared to other developing countries and even some developed countries is the control over prices of essential goods. Without control there will always be profiteering. And profiteering will result in a high rate of inflation."

"Today wage earners in particular are suffering. Wages have not increased to compensate for increased cost of living. While chasing prices with increases in wages can cause a wage/price spiral, but judicious increases to cushion off the rising costs would reduce the impact of inflation on the lower income people."

The Millionaire And His Beautiful Daughter

Once there was a millionaire, who collected live alligators. He kept them in the pool in back of his mansion. The millionaire also had a beautiful daughter who was single. One day, the millionaire decides to throw a huge party, and during the party he announces,
"My dear guests, I have a proposition to every man here. I will give one million dollars, or my daughter, to the man who can swim across this pool full of alligators and emerge unharmed!"

As soon as he finished his last word, there was the sound of a large splash in the pool. The guy in the pool was swimming with all his might, and the crowd began to cheer him on. Finally, he made it to the other side of the pool unharmed. The millionaire was impressed. He said, "That was incredible! Fantastic! I didn't think it could be done! Well, I must keep my end of the bargain. Do you want my daughter or the one million dollars?"

The guy catches his breath, then says, "Listen, I don't want your money! And I don't want your daughter! I want the bastard who pushed me in the pool!"